I've already had my tea, and some lemon yogurt. I must say, most all of yogurt sucks. But Lemon is amazing. Smooth and not to sweet, refreshing. Good start to the day. Now I'm chillin' to a bit of E street radio on Sirius, "Twist and Shout" live.
How do you believe your own hype? Believe in yourself enough to make the person you are show up to the whole world. It's tough to do. Right now, that's my struggle. I know myself pretty damn well. I know what I'm about, but there are days that I look in the mirror for a minute to long and suddenly I have no idea who the fuck I am. Sure, I"m a divorced mom, a 36 year old woman with a great sense of humor, an oversexed mind, and a romantic nature that tricks my mind into believing the fairytale. Maybe I have listened to to much Springsteen. Wanting a man who with a dirty leather jacket and worn out jeans to take me away is just not real. But I don't know that I'm ready to stop believing. I'm not ready to chuck things that have kept me afloat the past few years especially. Truthfully Bruce is not all about the romanticism. He also delves deep into the loss, the despair and the heartache of not knowing yourself, of finding out the woman/man you loved is not who you thought they were. I guess I'm battling the romantic in me with the logical side that knows the real truth.
I have no idea why I'm so contemplative at this hour of the day, but sometimes a good cup of tea can do that to you. Oh, and on another note, I have a date today. It's funny how good it all seems on paper. You meet this person, you have all this AWESOME stuff in common...and then you meet and it all disappears. I'm hoping that's not the case. If it goes south, I'll have a good date story for everyone. Oh, and I have a few in the vault I'm going to start posting. Bad dates that should at least make you laugh and thank god you weren't me in that situation.
I think I need another cup of tea.
No comments:
Post a Comment